silly thought of the day before I roll back to bed:
the Master keeps his TCE on his nightstand, just where he keeps his books, experiments or toys he used the night before. And one day, before going to ruin some alien race’s lives he accidentally grabbed the wrong thing end ended up threatening everyone with a Dildo without even noticing. like.. eventually he did when he inevitably ran into the Doctor, but just…
please tell me it was sparkly?
Let me first say that I firmly believe that the self-advocacy movement is about autistic people advocating for themselves how they see fit even if other autistic people might not see eye to eye. This is just a letter to convey that you have other options and that, while I don’t support the organization you associate yourself with, I will support you in your self-advocacy as much as I can without crossing that boundary of supporting Autism Speaks.
I, myself, am an Autistic self-advocate, and I, too, have a history with Autism Speaks. I was diagnosed when I was about 10 or 11, but my parents didn’t disclose my diagnosis until I was about 12 or 13. When my parents disclosed my diagnosis to me, they kept their explanation of autism very simple and brief. That little bit of information satisfied me until I was 16. When I was 16, I wanted to learn more about autism. I found a book in my parents’ room about autism, and I read that book cover to cover. In hindsight, it wasn’t the best book for me to read as it wasn’t very positive about autism. However, I didn’t just stop at the book. I took to the internet. I googled “autism”, and, of course, the first thing that showed up was Autism Speaks. It was 2006, and Autism Speaks was still new to the autism community, but it had the backing of Bob Wright who is a very wealthy, well-connected media executive so he had the resources to start Autism Speaks off with a bang.
At the time, Autism Speaks had a message board, and I quickly signed up for it. “Great!” I thought, “Maybe I’ll learn more about autism from other people with autism!” I learned that there weren’t many autistic people on the message board, and that most of the people on the message board were parents. “Well, I guess that’s ok.” I thought slightly disappointed, but still optimistic “Maybe they can teach me about autism too.” I was paying attention to what the parents were saying about autism. I learned early on that autism is a bad thing that should be cured. I believed them. I was brainwashed (Yes, I did use that word.) to believe that I don’t know anything about autism and that the only people who knew about autism were the “nice” people at Autism Speaks. I enjoyed my time on the message board. It was great to at least talk about my autism, but I still got the feeling that something wasn’t quite right. “Why is it that I’m one of just a small handful of autistic people, and everybody else is a parent or a teacher?”
I was open about my autism from when I was about 16 to 19. When I was open about my autism, people were condescending to me, but I didn’t say anything about it because I didn’t feel like I was normal enough to be treated as a real human. When I was 19, I went to college out-of-state, and I took this chance to start over. I didn’t want people to talk down to me so I tried everything I could to hide my autism. I didn’t seek accommodations from disability services at my college which was a big factor in my failing from that college. I never told my roommate I was on the autism spectrum until halfway through the second semester, and I would force myself to act as neurotypical as possible.
After a year at my first college and failing, I tried community college at home with the same kind of luck before. I still couldn’t accept that I needed support and, instead, I still focused my energies on “fixing” myself. It wasn’t until my third college that I started to move towards accepting myself as I am. This college had a program for people on the autism spectrum, and my parents wouldn’t pay for college anymore unless I went to this college with this program. Halfway through the second semester of my third year at college, I decided to try again to get back into the autism community online, and I started to blog on Tumblr thinking that maybe I could find people like me here. It’s been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I learned that I wasn’t broken or in need of a cure. I learned that I really do know more about autism than people not on the spectrum do and that my voice matters. I learned about a great organization called the Autistic Self Advocacy Network that is run completely by and for Autistic people, and I am now a chapter leader for them.
Kerry Magro, Amy Gravino, and other people on the spectrum who support Autism Speaks, as you probably are aware, your colleague John Elder Robinson recently left Autism Speaks because he saw that his efforts were in vain. He could tell that Autism Speaks wasn’t really listening to him. I understand that Autism Speaks has given you jobs, but you don’t have to settle for mid-level leadership positions and token statuses as your best option. You don’t have to settle for an organization that talks about you without you.
Reblogged for those that have not seen it.
TRIGGER WARNING: misogynoir, violence, harassment, sexual abuse, rape.
@HoodFeminism (which is @Karnythia's and @thewayoftheid's work) hosted a Twitter discussion regarding the stereotype of “fast tailed girls” that Black girls deal with primarily during adolescence, but certainly starts before that for many Black girls and continues well into adulthood (i.e. the Jezebel controlling image). I put many of the tweets shared in this discussion in a Storify: #FastTailedGirls: Examining The Stereotypes and Abuse That Black Girls Face though a few are included above.
"Fast tailed" girls: Black girls stereotyped as “hypersexual” beings and seeking sex whether or not they are sexually active. This stereotype is proliferated in the home (especially by some mothers and older women), within the Black community (i.e church, socially; especially by the Black men who abuse and by some Black male leaders who want this silenced) and amidst society itself (i.e. schools, media; because of racism and White supremacist notions of womanhood). These Black girls are viewed: as “adult” women “asking” for abuse,” as responsible for the abuse that primarily adult Black men inflict on them or coerce them into and often inflict without punishment let alone blame from the Black community (as “protecting” Black men from racism often takes precedence over any other intraracial issue); as providing consent simply by experiencing puberty (or not even experiencing puberty); as automatically heterosexual; as automatically culpable for any street harassment, physical violence, sexual violence or emotional abuse that they experience. A Black girl with confidence who speaks up for herself, wants to express her femininity visually, has a normal interest in boys, gets unwanted attention from adult men, and/or has male friends can easily be labeled as such. This stereotype sits in a binary opposed to “respectable" Black girls while both "types" of Black girls are regularly abused. It is the hatred of Blackness, womanhood and childhood (or rejection of a period of childhood actually existing for Black girls) intersecting in this dangerous stereotype.
Though difficult of course, this conversation was so important and I am grateful to Hood Feminism for their presence, in general, and for this conversation, specifically. It is important to discuss how within and outside of our communities internalizing the hateful messages about Blackness, womanhood and Black womanhood specifically has caused so much harm, much irreversible. What can change is how we think about ourselves as Black women, meaning ending shaming and ending buying into patriarchal binaries about Black girls and Black women while simultaneously protecting abusers. Have open conversations about how patriarchal masculinity is literally killing men, Black men in particular, and how while it is true that they are very much so oppressed via race, as all Black people are, they are also oppressors of Black women. Black women also support this structure when abusers are defended and protected and our truths and experiences are silenced by other Black women and anyone else among Black people; that has to end. Deconstructing and rejecting the way that racism, White supremacy, anti-Blackness and sexism create this stereotype for Black girls, ones that impact them inside and outside of the Black community.
The abuse has to end. The education has to be received. The compassion has to be shared. The unlearning has to commence. The truth has to be spoken, even if at 140 characters at a time. Even if in small groups and in supermarket aisles and schools and churches and anywhere. Black girls deserve better than this. Black women deserve more than the pain of the memories of abuse and the fear that another generation of Black girls will experience the same.
- #FastTailedGirls: Examining The Stereotypes and Abuse That Black Girls Face - this is my Storify mentioned above; includes many tweets (including some of mine) by Black women who spoke out; includes tweets from a trans woman of colour (@HarmonyBabydoll) who added an important dimension to this conversation.
- The Myth of “Fast Black Girls” by @LexiScorsese - inspired this conversation
- Hood Feminism blog
- Misogyny, In General vs. Anti-Black Misogyny (Misogynoir), Specifically
- Black Men and Patriarchy, Intraracial Sexism and Misogynoir (multiple essays listing)
- Abuse Culture: Domestic Violence, Rape, Body Dehumanization and Street Harassment (multiple essays listing)
- Patricia Hill Collins’ books: Black Feminist Thought and Black Sexual Politics speaks to the roots of this stereotype.
- Womanism, Black Feminism and Race In Feminist Discourse (Updated) (multiple essays listing)
Keep learning, growing and healing. ❤
(Please leave content above intact if you reblog. Please take care before adding any comments to this post. It is very serious and very painful for many Black women. Victim blaming and statements supporting rape culture are unwelcome here by people who think they have a “right” to harm us because this conversation occurred publicly. Please be respectful.)
For more commentary
ONLY DAYS LEFT TO RAISE FUNDS, URGENT LIFE OR DEATH HELP NEEDED ONE LAST TIME
Tumblr friends. You all saved my life. Unfortunately I need help one last time to keep it that way.You helped me pay down a hospital bill so I could have major brain surgery in October. Well, the bill for that is $9,600- Medicaid covered the hospital, NOT the doctor(!!). due to financial hardship, it’s reduced to $4,500.
The problem: the doctor HAS TO adjust and monitor my new neuro implant every other week, and I WILL DIE WITHOUT THE ADJUSTMENTS. But he is NOT ALLOWED to see me more than once more unless this is paid.
The reduction has conditions: I must pay $1,000 by Dec 16, and the $3,500 balance by Dec 23.
This is a terrible blow to me, unreal. I can’t stop crying in sheer frustration.
So, sadly, I must ask for help one least time (I can get on Free Care in April). You’ve all already been so generous. The SPNFamily, and Tumblr at large has been amazing. And if there were any way to avoid asking, I would.
PLEASE DONATE IF YOU CAN! I’ve set up a PayPal with the email email@example.com to accept funds (if you “send to a friend” there’s no fee). The hospital can only accept payment from me.
I know the Holidays are already an expensive time. Maybe give someone the gift of saving a life in their name? And I know I recently got so much help from you all. If I had any way to avoid this I would. And of course I’m happy to repay with fics, songs, editing, or anything I can.
As it is I’m also homeless and sometimes staying with my violent abusive parents, other times staying with friends. Every cent I get is going to other medical expenses and necessities.
PLEASE SHARE THIS as far and wide as you can! Share it as text so everyone can read and share again. Whether or not you can give, others may be able to.
Thank you all so so much! Below are some photos just to show what I mean. They called me with the settlement, but the original bill is there, as well as a few of my scars (yes they shaved the whole side of my head).
Thank you again! PLEASE DONATE AND SHARE IF YOU CAN, and ask me any questions.
Sopranish is my friend, and I’ve personally witnessed the reality of her struggles, so I can vouch for both the urgency and the legitimacy of this plea for help. She is on a time crunch and really scared, so any shares or donations would be so, so appreciated. Every little thing helps!!
Boris Johnson’s legacy to London- traveller apocalypse
Pantone’s color of the year for 2014. “Welcome to Night Vale” continues its takeover of the world.
Mark Strickson said he wanted less action in Doctor Who and more domestic life.
"pass me the marmalade, Doctor"
"Let’s go buy a new pair of socks, Turlough!"
Damn, domestic life.
I would watch that.
Aaaahhhhhhh I am on so many meds now
I had to put one bottle in sort of diagonally so it would fit in my medicine cabinet
This pleases me.